How to be a responsible parent? Techniques every parent should know.

Vandana’s parents had no clue about Psychology and Counselling as a career. They wanted their daughter to take up Commerce and work in a Bank, just like them. But after seeing Vandana’s interest and understanding of people and their problems and her dislike for a “desk job”, her parents met a neighbor who taught Psychology in a college, asked Vandana to talk to a few friends who were studying Psychology, all of them approached a career counsellor to find out the scope of Psychology as a career and then they encouraged Vandana to take up Psychology as her major.

As parents they helped Vandana realize her strengths and weaknesses and study the subject that she liked. They showed their child that they were concerned about her and supported her at every step to take the appropriate decision.

Would you do the same?

As a parent, you naturally are concerned about your child’s future. Parents have a key role to play in the decision-making and the general career path that their children choose to pursue; but how involved should you be in this decision-making process? Should you adopt a hands-on approach? What is the best advice you can give your child at this point? 

It is important as parents to offer guidance and encouragement but not take over their career planning entirely. Your child needs to be assisted in her career planning based on her strengths and passions. Parents are definitely more experienced and have seen much more of the world than their children and their inputs would be better and correct in most aspects.  However, they should guard against imposing their ideas and knowledge on their children. It is at all times better that parents and children jointly decide on which career the child could pursue. The child can get information about the state-of-the-art career trends while the parents can get their hands-on knowledge to the board to make this decision.

As parents, we need to inspire our children by:

• Having a good parent-child relationship where communication is open
• Having positive attitudes, views and values
• Letting our child know that we believe in her/him
• Helping our child develop socially, personally and professionally
• Providing opportunities for our child to learn and develop

It is important to encourage children to set realistic and achievable goals for the academic years and beyond and assist them in working towards these goals. This would help your child to stay motivated and focused.

In relation to a career choice, as a parent you should:

• Assist in the decision-making process
• Support your child’s decisions
• Inculcate an attitude of self-belief in your child by being optimistic and never critical – as a parent, your words will have the biggest influence on your child
• Provide your child freedom and time to understand where her skills lie
• Offer encouragement to pursue interests and ambitions, maybe outside the academic realm

Points to remember when helping your child with career choices

The decisions your child makes in her early life (e.g which school/college to go to, the subjects to choose, etc.) can impact your child’s career path. If this decision is heavily influenced by your preferences, the child may end up following a path which might not interest it. It is advisable to consult a career counselor for your child to choose the right career path.

Everyone has a unique set of skills and aptitudes. Educate your child that life is about self-discovery and about new skills and talents being developed. Each child is unique in her own way, and so may possess different skills and abilities as compared to you, his/her parents. With this in mind, choosing a career similar to the parents may not be the right course of action.

Equip your child with a mind-set to overcome the bumps that she may face at times and to move forward always. Also, discuss backup opportunities and contingency plans if your child’s first-choice strategy doesn’t work out.

Wrap-up lines

As a parent, do not force your children to follow your dreams, nor should you force them to study something that they do not really want to study. But do believe that your child will study something that they are interested in, even passionate about. Allow your children to follow their dreams, which should of course be realistic and achievable. Remember, you can always seek the right career advice and get help from our experienced online career assessment consultants.